the art of eating

She had brought a cake. A thick, sweet cake to commemorate our final meeting.


Her black eyes smiled and we rotated our chairs, ready to partake. I flushed, embarrassed to have forgotten the plates and silverware. As the teacher, this was my job. I excused myself, ran to the kitchen, piled plate upon plate on my arms, and walked slowly back. Entering the classroom, I nearly dropped the plates.


The cake joined my Korean adult students as the sun does the universe. Laughing and joking in mother tongue, chopsticks clicked together as they brought the sweet fleshy morsels of cake to their mouths. They didn’t need my hard plastic plates. The cake was enough. A sweet communion. I humbly picked up some chopsticks and partook.


Korea taught me a lot about the art of eating. Food is a gift, not only to our bodies, but to our souls. Everything is eaten in community. As glasses clink and heads bow, food is served first to the eldest and then down the line of ages. One hand crisscrosses another in the traditional form of respect shown when serving another. An elder’s glass is never to go empty. When drinking, one is not to look one’s elder in the eye. Children are trained in the art of eating from a young age, by grandparents who share the same home as them.


The cake is finished, save for a few crumbs. “Gundaye” we toast, lifting our plastic glasses of overly sweet rice wine to our lips. I tuck this memory into my Anorexic heart to take home with me.


To take home to Canada. To contrast against my nation’s fast-food hallways and litter-strewn drive-thrus. To pit against the lonely grandparents with their TV dinners and their Price is Right programs. To hold up against the teenager in the bathroom holding back her hair while she regurgitates the ice cream she hungrily consumed in angst. To contrast with the cold aisles full of properly stamped “Blue Menu” items in the grocery store, and the manicured hands that only choose “organic” or “lite” or “free-range” or “low-carb” or “high in Omega 3” without really knowing what any of it means. Only knowing it appeases another worry in an unmanicured life.


I will take this memory and treasure the symbolism of food. As a recovering Anorexic, this symbol has breathed new life into me. No longer is food an object to be feared. It is a necessity to be enjoyed and embraced.  It is another form of communication, another way of sharing in this thing called life, of relating with other humans through a means devoid of words. It is the breaking of bread, which Christ calls us to.





  1. naomi said,

    July 11, 2007 at 12:31 pm

    Great post Em. I love this about Korea too. Everyone digging in, heedless of germs or portions, no-one saying “just a sliver please.” Everyone ordering and eating lunch together. Every piece of food offered around. it’s definitely a custom I want to bring home too!

  2. abbagirl74 said,

    July 12, 2007 at 3:19 am

    It’s a custom I love and is only two short hours away. My mom still does many of the traditional meals. This was a wonderful post Emily.

    Are you doing okay?

  3. Melanie said,

    July 13, 2007 at 2:49 am

    Thanks for this post. I love your description of the grocery store and the zillions of choices for our “health conscience” nation! I sometimes feel overwhelemed;)

    This post was truly refreshing and well written. Can’t wait for your book:) Thanks for your honesty.

    Hey, happy belated anniversary to you and Trent:)

    love, Mel

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