crayon doodle

i’m reading ‘lullabies for little criminals’ while he nurses. the words blur with the slurp, slurp sound. his lashes are long on cheek, hand guiding an invisible orchestra. i touch his hair. surprised, somehow, at how soft it is. i do this every day. not believing the miracle that is baby. mum is moaning on the couch. she too is waving her hand. it’s a fuzzy day. trent’s gone and i don’t know how dad and i are going to get her off the couch. maybe by the time he gets back, she’ll be feeling better.

the slurping stops and aiden stares up at me, lips like a crayon doodle. i lay him on the change table and he flings his arms wide open as if to hug me. opens his mouth wide like he’s going to bite the air, then stretches it into a smile that looks like a laugh. then he starts to speak, trying hard to form his tongue around a word which sounds like “gurgle” and for a moment, i forget about mum, moaning on the couch, and i just stare at my son. “hi,” i say, smiling like a giddy school girl and he giggles. then i scoop him up into my neck and hold him like that for a long time.

(thank you, Prairie Chick, for the humbling award…)



  1. Linda said,

    January 30, 2010 at 2:29 am

    I saw your award there and thought “Yes”.
    Praying your Mum is doing a bit better. You are a precious Mum yourself and a loving daughter.

  2. Teneale said,

    February 1, 2010 at 3:31 pm

    Congrats on a award! You totally deserve it, just as you deserve a wondeful, beautiful, smiling, gurgling baby boy! I’m so excited to meet him. I hope your Mom is doing well today. Love you.

  3. February 4, 2010 at 1:15 am

    It is such a gift to be able to capture love like this.

    and congratulations on the award.

    Thank you for taking the time to read my words. Your comments are cherished. Deeply.
    I’m trying to decide how to move forward on this every widening path. Slowly I know that. Waiting for His voice.

    Enjoy your week.

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